on releasing my attachment to discover my twin flame

every day i am presented with choices to make. my mind always wanting to please others, i know which direction he tries to steer me. he wants to win at all costs. he wants to be right no matter what the fallout. he needs that approval.

man this is deeply rooted inside me. 

i can feel my soul send shivers down my right arm, now my left. a chill encompasses my entire being. immediately i know what is important to me. 


how can i express my love today?

love for myself, love for my twin flame, love for others, love for life.

i am a creature of habit but am breaking my ties. i no longer need to live the same way, everyday.

if something is not making me happy, i choose to get at the seed of that thought, remove it from my garden and plant a new seed.

i know i can. i have the tools the strength and the power to do so. i may need to weed my garden of my worries but when i do, my world answers me with bountiful blessings. 

a case in point.

just over a year ago, i asked the girl of my dreams to marry me. we hiked to the top of her favorite peak (alone in a blizzard) where i dropped to one knee and expressed my love, my commitment, my excitement to share the rest of my life with her. and the best part, she eventually said yes - yes eventually, that's a side story i'll share at some point.

Derek Russell proposes atop mountain to kara

the joy running through my body right meow fills me with peace. it fills me with pure happiness again. to think about that moment that happened just over a year ago, i am immediately a little boy again full of youthful expression.

but before i was with her, i was alone. i was alone for many years. i was lonely. i wanted her in my life. 

i dated many young and beautiful women. many only lasted a couple of dates. a couple were longer but eventually those relationships turned into better friendships. we knew we each had a different life we were meant to live. and so we moved on.

and it was hard. living years without anyone. by myself. i was attractive, funny, athletic, smart. where was she? and why haven't i found he yet, i agonized about it day after day.

i did something new to me. i called upon my angels to help me find her. 

my soul reminds me, when you can live and trust that what you desire is coming back to you, you will be surprised at how quickly you see what you desire appearing in your life. and it will come to you when you are ready. no earlier, no later.

i practice visualizing my life with my future wife. i see us smiling. laughing. playing. traveling the world. helping millions. i imagine the adventures we take together, the experiences we share, the love.

i grin from ear to ear this morning seeing the complete verification of this tool in my life.

as i released my inner need to have this girl in my life, the universe guided me into her arms.

when you committed to trusting yourself, when you let go of that incessant attachment, + when you really felt the emotions of being with her, you aligned yourself with your next level of awareness. you freed your mind from worry. your expression of gratitude in this moment brought you more to be grateful for.

be one with your creator.

be one with your spirit.

bringing this awareness into my mind this morning of what i created, i am at peace. i feel AMAZING! i can do whatever i intend. all i need to do i ask my angels for guidance, put the power of intention to work and trust the universe will handle all the details. 

I choose abundance for life.